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I’m a creature of habit. Which is ironic because I have ADHD and, well… routines and ADHD don’t always get along. But over the years, I’ve realized something: if I want to function like a semi-responsible adult (even on the days I’d rather nap under my desk), I need some kind of routine. The trick? I’ve had to build routines that work with my ADHD brain—not against it.
If you’ve ever felt like no matter how hard you try, routines just don’t stick, you’re not alone. This blog is for you.
Why Routines Feel Impossible When You Have ADHD
Let’s start with the obvious: routines can be really hard when you have ADHD. And it’s not because you’re lazy or undisciplined. It’s because ADHD messes with how our brains handle structure and time.
According to Psychology Today, ADHD affects executive function, which is basically the part of the brain responsible for planning, organizing, and following through on stuff. You know, all the things routines are built on.
Then there’s time blindness. UCI Health explains this as a real ADHD symptom, where we struggle to perceive time accurately. It’s why we can be “running late” before we’ve even started the task. Or why “I’ll do it in five minutes” turns into two hours of scrolling TikTok.
And here’s the weird paradox: I crave structure. My brain loves predictability. But it also resists it. The moment I try to lock myself into a routine that feels too rigid or boring, my brain starts yelling, “Nope. Not today.”
What’s Actually Helped Me Build Routines (Sometimes)
I’ll be real—I’m still figuring it out. But here are some things that have helped me build and maintain routines that don’t make me feel trapped or broken:
1. I Make My Routine Visible
If I can’t see it, I’ll forget it exists. I use sticky notes, a big whiteboard calendar, and phone reminders. Sometimes all three at once. Out of sight means out of mind, and my brain needs visual cues.
2. I Break Tasks Into Tiny Steps
“Clean the kitchen” is too vague. But “put away dishes,” “wipe the counter,” and “take out trash” feels doable. Every small win counts, and seeing progress keeps me from giving up.
3. I Stack Habits
Habit stacking changed the game for me. I pair new tasks with things I already do. For example, after brushing my teeth, I stretch. After making coffee, I take my meds. I’m not reinventing the wheel—I’m just adding to it.
4. I Build in Flexibility
I give myself “wiggle room.” If my morning routine gets thrown off, I don’t toss the whole day away. I try to have a loose Plan B (and C) so I’m not derailed by one change.
5. I Use Tech to My Advantage
Timers. Alarms. To-do apps. They’re my external brain. I’ve learned not to rely on memory alone—it’s not a strong suit for me, and that’s okay.
6. I Show Myself Some Grace
Sometimes my routines fall apart. Sometimes I forget everything I set out to do. When that happens, I’m learning to forgive myself instead of spiraling. Shame doesn’t help. Kindness does.
You Don’t Have to Do This the “Normal” Way
The world tells us routines have to look a certain way—get up at 5 AM, go for a jog, meditate, eat a healthy breakfast, do 47 productive things by noon. That’s cute. But for those of us with ADHD, that’s just not realistic.
What works for you might look messy to someone else. It might change week to week. That doesn’t mean you’re failing. It means you’re adapting.
One thing that really helped me was diving deeper into why routines were such a struggle. I actually broke a lot of this down in my guidebook, Navigating Daily Life with ADHD. It’s not some perfect formula—it’s a mix of real talk, practical ideas, and things that have helped me find a little more peace and predictability. If you want to check it out, you can grab it right here.
You’re Not Alone
If routines feel impossible, I promise you’re not the only one. Millions of adults with ADHD are trying to figure this out. Some days we nail it. Some days we nap through it. Either way, we keep showing up.
I’m not a mental health professional. I’m just someone living with ADHD who’s learned how to work with my brain instead of constantly fighting it. You deserve a routine that feels doable, not dreadful.
If that sounds like something you want, I hope this helps you take the first step.
Recap
In this post, I opened up about why adults with ADHD struggle with routines—and how I’m learning to make them work for me. You don’t need to follow the world’s version of “perfect” routines. You just need something that fits your brain and your life.
5 Key Takeaways:
- ADHD affects executive function and time perception, which makes routines harder.
- Visual reminders and task breakdowns can make routines easier to follow.
- Habit stacking helps add new routines to existing ones naturally.
- Flexibility and grace are key to bouncing back from routine disruptions.
- You don’t need to copy others—create routines that work for you.
FAQ
Q. Why do adults with ADHD struggle with routines?
A. ADHD affects the brain’s ability to plan, prioritize, and stick with tasks. It also messes with time perception, which makes routines harder to follow consistently.
Q. What helps adults with ADHD stick to routines?
A. Visual aids, timers, habit stacking, and breaking tasks into small steps have helped me a lot. Flexibility and grace are also really important.
Q. How do I stop feeling bad when I can’t follow a routine?
A. First, remind yourself it’s not about laziness. ADHD brains work differently. I try to treat myself with the same kindness I’d offer a friend.
Q. Can ADHD routines look different than neurotypical routines?
A. Absolutely. Your routine might not look traditional, and that’s okay. The best routine is the one that works for you.
Much love. Good vibes. – Ky
