What to Do When Your Doctor Says You’re Too Old for an ADHD Diagnosis
Let me say this right up front: You’re not too old for an ADHD diagnosis. I don’t care if you’re 28, 48, or 78. ADHD doesn’t suddenly stop being real just because your age starts with a different number. And yet, this is one of the most common messages I get during my livestreams:
“Ky, my doctor told me I’m too old to be diagnosed with ADHD. Now what?”
That question breaks my heart every time. And that’s exactly why we’re talking about it today.
I’m not a medical professional. I’m just a guy who was diagnosed with ADHD at 34, after years of being dismissed, overlooked, and told I was just lazy, emotional, or “bad with time.” If you’ve been told you’re too old for an ADHD diagnosis, I’m here to tell you: you’re not the problem. The system is.
You’re Not Too Old. The Research Proves It.
According to the CDC, over 55 percent of adults diagnosed with ADHD received that diagnosis after turning 18. For women, that number jumps to 61 percent. That’s not a fluke. That’s a system that’s only recently started to catch up to the truth: ADHD doesn’t disappear with age. It just gets better at hiding in plain sight.
And I get it, some doctors still don’t see it. A 2024 federal study revealed that many healthcare providers aren’t trained to diagnose ADHD in adults. They might not recognize the symptoms. Or worse, they may just write them off as personality flaws or midlife burnout.
Source: Federal Study on Barriers to Adult ADHD Diagnosis
Why Your Doctor Might Be Wrong
If your doctor told you you’re too old to have ADHD, it doesn’t mean they’re evil. But it might mean they’re misinformed. ADHD in adults often looks very different than it does in kids. It’s less about hyperactivity and more about things like:
- Time blindness
- Chronic overwhelm
- Forgetting to eat
- Struggling with focus
- Constantly starting but never finishing tasks
- Emotional reactivity that feels… extra
If your doctor doesn’t understand these things, they may not recognize the signs when you describe them. That doesn’t mean you’re imagining it. That means you need a provider who gets it.
What You Can Do Next (Even Without a Diagnosis)
If your current doctor dismisses your concerns, here are some steps that helped me and others in our ADHD community:
1. Get a second opinion.
Preferably from someone who specializes in adult ADHD. You can find directories through organizations like CHADD or ADDA.
2. Try a telehealth evaluation.
Telehealth has completely changed the game. About half of adults diagnosed with ADHD now do it through virtual consults. It’s safe, effective, and often more accessible.
Source: Telehealth for ADHD Services
3. Start with alternative support.
Even without a formal diagnosis, there are treatments and tools that can help. For me, mindfulness practices and ADHD coaching were huge. (And yes, coaching is backed by science too.)
Source: ADHD Coaching Research
4. Join a community.
The online ADHD community, especially on social media, helped me feel less alone. People were describing things I thought were just me. It was the first time I felt seen.
5. Focus on progress, not perfection.
You don’t have to “prove” your ADHD to anyone. If you’re struggling, you’re worthy of support. Period.
You Deserve Answers, Even If They’re Late
One of the hardest parts about being diagnosed later in life is grieving the time you lost not knowing. You start to look back at school, jobs, relationships, and wonder: what if I had known sooner? I’ve been there. It hurts.
But there’s also relief. There’s peace in finally having a name for what you’ve been carrying all this time. As someone once told me, “It’s like someone finally tuned in the radio. And now it all makes sense.”
That’s what I want for you.
A Quick Note on Managing ADHD and Finances
Something I also hear often: “I finally got my diagnosis, but now I’m overwhelmed by how ADHD affects my money.” If that’s you, I wrote a guidebook that breaks this down in a super simple way. It’s called Navigating Finances with ADHD, and it’s designed to help people like us feel more in control, without shame or complicated spreadsheets.
You can check it out right here.
Let’s Keep Talking About This
If your doctor said you were too old for an ADHD diagnosis, I want to hear your story. Leave a comment. Share your experience. You’re not alone, and you’re definitely not too late.
Recap
Getting told you’re “too old” for an ADHD diagnosis is frustrating, but it’s not the end of the road. You deserve answers, support, and a care team that takes you seriously.
5 Key Takeaways:
- Over 55% of ADHD diagnoses happen after age 18.
- Many doctors still lack training in adult ADHD.
- Telehealth is a valid option for getting evaluated.
- You can seek support and treatment without a formal diagnosis.
- You are never too old to better understand yourself.
Actionable Items
- Research ADHD-specialized providers in your area or through telehealth.
- Download a symptom checklist from CHADD or ADDA.
- Journal about how your symptoms affect daily life.
- Try mindfulness or ADHD coaching.
- Grab my ADHD finances guidebook if money stuff feels overwhelming.
FAQ Section
Q. Can I really get an ADHD diagnosis in my 40s or 50s?
A. Yes. More than half of adults with ADHD were diagnosed after age 18. It’s never too late.
Q. What should I do if my doctor dismisses me?
A. Get a second opinion from someone who understands adult ADHD. Telehealth is a great option too.
Q. Can I treat ADHD without medication?
A. Absolutely. Mindfulness, coaching, therapy, and organization tools can all help.
Q. How long does an ADHD evaluation usually take?
A. A thorough one takes 2–3 hours, often split over a couple of sessions.
Q. Do I need an official diagnosis to start getting help?
A. Nope. If you’re struggling, there are supports you can use today, diagnosis or not.
Much love. Good vibes. – Ky
