Have you ever stared at a pile of laundry on your “doom chair” for three days straight? Or perhaps you bought a fancy planner months ago that you have not opened since the day you brought it home.
If you nodded your head, you are in the right place.
We often hear advice that sounds simple on the surface. People tell us to “just do it” or “make a list.” But as my guest today perfectly put it: “It’s like, well, no, if I could do that, then I wouldn’t have ADHD.”
That feeling of paralysis is real. It is not about laziness. It is about needing a different kind of support structure.
The “Listen Now” Hub
In this episode, I sit down with my friend Chris Wang. She is the founder of Shimmer ADHD Coaching and has helped thousands of adults reach their goals. We talk about why traditional productivity advice fails us and introduce a new tool called Indy that might help change the game.
This season of The Vibe With Ky Podcast is proudly presented by Sucreabeille. They are a woman-owned indie perfume house that captures stories in a bottle. If you want to know what this show smells like, check out my collaboration scent: Why Did I Walk Into This Room?. It features notes of fresh baked cherry pie and radical self-acceptance.
Why Standard Advice Fails Us
We have all tried to force our brains into neurotypical boxes. We buy the calendars. We set the alarms. Then we feel shame when they do not work.
Chris explained that standard systems fail because they miss a critical component: “It’s because it doesn’t consider emotional regulation.”
Most productivity advice gives you the endpoint. It tells you to put four tasks on a calendar and complete them. But for us, the barrier isn’t knowing what to do. It is the internal conversation about why we should do it.
We need systems that account for our executive functioning challenges like time management and procrastination. We need internal motivation that comes from interest and passion, not solely willpower.
Building Your Scaffolding
One concept we discussed at length is “scaffolding.” It sounds technical, but it is essential for our survival.
Chris describes scaffolding as the “walls that you’ve predetermined around your life.”
Think of it as external structure. When our internal executive function beams are wobbly, we build support on the outside. This could mean automating decisions so you do not have to rethink every step of your day.
It allows us to run on autopilot a little bit more, saving our limited energy, or “spoons,” for the things that matter. Scaffolding is not cheating. It is infrastructure.
The Power of Body Doubling
Another strategy we embraced is body doubling. This is more than hanging out with a friend. There is real science behind why having another person present helps us get things done.
Chris noted that “accountability is by far my number one motivator.”
Body doubling provides positive social accountability. If you are sitting in a cafe or on a video call, you feel a gentle pressure to focus because others can see you.
You do not even need a live person to make this work. Chris shared a brilliant tip about using your phone camera. She sets up a tripod and films a time-lapse of herself working. She noted: “I did not stop until I built that desk because the time lapse was moving.”
Meet Indy: A Different Kind of Tool
Chris and the team at Shimmer recently launched a new app called Indy. It is designed specifically to act as digital scaffolding.
Unlike other apps that push you to move faster, Indy acts “like a mirror to help be this mirror to yourself and ask you the right questions at the right time.”
It helps you identify what is important to you and keeps those goals top of mind. Instead of running fast in a random direction, it ensures you are moving toward a life you chose.
Try This Today
If you are struggling to start a task right now, try the time-lapse trick. Set up your phone, hit record, and tell yourself you will work until the video is done. It creates immediate external accountability without needing to coordinate with another person.
Also, check out the Indy app. It is currently free and might be the support structure you have been looking for.
Much love. Good vibes. – Ky
Disclaimer: I am not a licensed mental health professional. I am simply a guy sharing my story. Please seek professional help if you are struggling.
