I talk a lot about the ADHD tax. We know all about the forgotten subscriptions, the late fees, and the crushing guilt of impulse buys. But there is another tax we pay that we do not discuss enough. The trauma tax. When my brain is completely burned out, my shoulders are practically glued to my ears. My jaw is clenched tight. I am physically holding onto the stress of the week. Sound familiar? We spend so much energy masking and performing for others that our physical bodies take the hit.
To help unpack this, I brought my friend Ari Bliss onto the show. Ari is a former professional ballerina who grew up performing at massive venues like Lincoln Center and Madison Square Garden. Today, she is a mindfulness coach who helps people manage anxiety through mindful movement. She is also the wonderful host of the Growth, Grace, and Gratitude podcast. Before we get into her insights, I want to give a quick shoutout to this season’s sponsor, Sucreabeille. If you need a comforting scent for a busy brain, check out our gender-neutral collab fragrance here: https://sucreabeille.com/products/why-did-i-walk-into-this-room, and visit https://sucreabeille.com/ for more great products.
The Physical Symptoms of Burnout and the “Trauma Tax”
We often think of adult ADHD and anxiety as purely mental struggles. But constantly striving for perfection takes a severe biological toll. Your nervous system is working overtime, flooding your body with stress hormones. According to clinical research from Harvard Medical School (https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/understanding-the-stress-response), the chronic activation of your survival mechanism leads directly to muscle tension, rapid breathing, and physical fatigue.
When you cannot get out of bed, it is not laziness. It is your biology reacting to an unsustainable load. Ari sees this physical tension stored in the body all the time when new students walk into her ballet classes.
“It is so beautiful to see students just connect to the present moment, even if it is for a short moment, because that’s really all it takes to begin to feel connected to yourself, really,” Ari notes. By simply paying attention to the physical body, you can start signaling to your brain that you are safe.
How Do You Change Careers When Your Identity is Tied to Work?
Ari spent years striving for flawless technique. The professional ballet world is basically the Olympics of perfectionism. But eventually, she realized that striving for that level of physical exactness was no longer healthy for her peace of mind. Finding one’s purpose without the guilt of quitting is incredibly hard, especially when your entire identity is tied up in your job title.
I asked her how she managed the fear of making a massive career shift in her 30s.
“I felt like once you reach a certain level of achievement, you have to be grateful and then you have to also be aware of your body if it does need rest or if a shift does have to happen,” Ari explained.
She shifted her path from professional dance to teaching beginner ballet classes, writing, and hosting her podcast. Taking a step back is not giving up. It is recalibrating. If you are struggling with a similar life transition, Ari offers a fantastic Inner Child Worksheet to help you reflect: https://blueblisscoach.wixsite.com/website/inner-child-worksheet.
Somatic Exercises for Anxiety and Inner Child Healing
So what exactly is somatic healing? It is a practice that focuses on the mind-body connection to release trapped energy. Research published by the National Institutes of Health (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8276707/) confirms that body-oriented therapies can significantly reduce symptoms of psychological distress and trauma.
Instead of just sitting and talking about anxiety, Ari encourages her students to stretch, breathe, and actively feel their limbs. We put so much pressure on ourselves to be flawless, but she reminds her students that making mistakes is simply part of the process.
“I think when we were growing up, like I was growing up jumping and like falling out of a turn, it was like a nightmare… but that’s okay too. It’s like you have to deal with it, you have to get over it, you have to accept the failure and keep going,” she said.
You can learn more about her approach to mindful movement on her YouTube channel (https://www.youtube.com/@balletdaily) or by following her on Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/growthandgracemindset).
People Also Ask
Q: What is somatic healing? A: Somatic healing focuses on the connection between the mind and the body. Instead of just talking through your feelings, you use physical movement, breathing exercises, and stretching to release pent-up energy and stress from your nervous system.
Q: Why does ADHD burnout cause physical pain? A: Burnout is a biological response. Constantly forcing your brain to focus or masking your neurodivergent traits keeps your nervous system in a state of high alert. This chronic stress causes muscle tension, jaw clenching, and severe fatigue.
Q: How do you release trauma stored in the body? A: You can start small. Ari recommends a simple 30-second roll-up stretch: stand with your feet flat, slowly roll your spine down toward your toes, and then slowly roll back up, reaching your arms to the sky. It helps reset your posture and brings your awareness back to the present moment.
Take a few minutes today to stretch, drink a glass of water, and give yourself a break. You do not have to be a perfect, productive machine to be worthy of rest. Disclaimer: I am not a licensed mental health professional. I am just a guy sharing my story. Please seek professional help if you are struggling.
Much love. Good vibes. – Ky
